Well tribes, it’s officially that time. We’re within 20 daylights of the premiere of. I can’t believe it’s ultimately here. Maybe I’m tearing up a little bit at my table rn just thinking about it. SUE ME. Located on all the shit we’ve been expertly reporting since last season’s climax and the new trailer that simply lowered, it’s safe to say this season “re gonna be all” illuminated af. One of the main points of theatre is likely to be Scheana’s relationship with Z-list actor Rob Valletta and whether or not he’s there for the right concludes. I’m sorry … Since when does Chris Harrison moonlight as a producer? We also know, thanks to an display of thirst trap Instagrams, that Sheana and Rob’s relationship is already dunzo. Or is it? Because over the weekend she affixed a ‘Gram with none other than Mr. Valletta at the Vanderpump Dogs gala with stomaches in the fucking caption. Brb. Travelling to the hospital to get checked out for the whiplash I went from trying to keep up with this shit.

I obvi have so many questions, that I will address right at Scheana, because obviously she’s decipher this. Are you back together? Are you still trying to attract that “we’re still best friends” bullshit none of us trust? What does this signify? You can’t simply affixed an extremely mature breakup pole on Instagram that peculiarity you wearing a waist-length fur in the California desert with no panties on and then change your attention. You only can’t. But maybe it’s exactly a little notoriety stunt, right? Like, one pic doesn’t prove anything. But wait for it…

BOOM. A little obscured gem in the comments part of Rob imparting “the worlds largest” fuckboy justify I’ve ever heard in my life. You get called out by a rando Instagram troll for not announcing shit of your on-again off-again lover, and the best you can do is, “[ Scheana] does affix more about her private life than I do”? I represent, you had is high time to upright all those shirtless selfies, Rob. I know your strategy. But tbh, I don’t care either way because this is clearly involved af we can count on Scheana’s exceedingly Botox’d face to cry about it at the reunion. And I live for a Bravo Botox cry.

One thing’s for sure, and it’s that somebody must be free to forward that last commenter a Xanax. Andrea, daughter, DM me.

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